I cannot stand dealing with your shit…but I have to. We all do. It’s ridiculous how you project your shit into other people and interrupt their lives. It’s selfish, it’s insufferable, and when you get your way when you’re being an awful and hurtful human I want to punch you in the throat.
Seriously. We know these emotional vampires that steal light and hope from others. Personally, I know way too many. Who’s fault is it? Mine. It’s also theirs, but mostly it’s mine for allowing those personalities into my air. I know I can choose some of the times this happens but what about the times we can’t control whether or not the vampires are in our lives.
Like work. I have worked in environments where the person who bitches the loudest and is the most sociopathic wins. At the very least these assholes are histrionic or narcissists. They manipulate situations and appear to be nice, however, in really they are conniving, insecure beasts. FYI-most of the time these folks don’t like me; they aren’t able to sell me their line of bullshit.
The downside of smelling their BS, they turn on you. They file complaints that have grains of truth but bastardize the facts. They interrupt the livelihoods of good employees who ordinarily work hard and want to be successful by gossiping, mistrust, manipulative behaviors, and just an overall blowing sunshine up the assets of those around them.
I’ve had my fair share of the people that abuse a system that’s broken and in desperate need of repair. I’m kind of a bad ass so when this has happened it’s been traumatic, but I can handle it with some support. It’s when the good and kind are attacked that sticks in my crawl.
I wish I had this blog several years back when I had my single white female stalker at work. She was absolutely a charmer who had my work life disrupted because of her actions (similar and exact to a narcissist). But I survived. I had good friends and supportive leaders it the damage was done. When situations arise and affects my circle I react.
When I see people I care about exhibiting similar traits (which I am currently seeing) I cringe and have to re-evaluate my circle. I try to intervene and offer support, then I take a step back and look at as many angles as possible-and attempt to give the benefit of a doubt.
What can you do if you are this creature sucking or manipulating others to meet a need? Get help. Period. Talk to someone about learning ways to change your mind and heart. You are lowering morale, you are hurting others, and you are hurting yourself. Unfortunately, you may not think what you’re doing is wrong. It is.
If you are the recipient-walk away. Toxic people are damaging to your health. If you work with these people surround yourself with a rock solid team to lean on and invest in a big box of coping skills. Most of all, practice self care. It’s is absolutely necessary. Those people really suck. Don’t let them suck the life out of you.
This is absolutely dedicated to my dear friends across the country who live with the parasitic humans that suck the life out of them. I am with you in person and in spirit.
~WM~
Whiskey Momma 